Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
