im drinking this country out of the recession.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize