the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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