He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
