I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
