and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
