If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
