Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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