ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
