There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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