You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
they're like a gay fantastic four
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize