We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
