Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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