i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
