i permit you to call me
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
