we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
My cat gives me a boner
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
We left an ass print on the piano.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
