Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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