Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
