why didn't you poke me back
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
