I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize