Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
