Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
