i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize