ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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