Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
