I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
