i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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