We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize