And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
