dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
