I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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