He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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