wanna go halves on a baby?
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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