Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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