You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize