He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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