Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
