Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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