So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
My vagina is officially offended.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize