my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
