just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
