So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
