That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
