hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
