We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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