i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
