your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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