We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
