just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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