Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
